I Know Way Too Much About Nothing…

Don’t ask me how these things come across my desk but today I was lead to an on line blog dated September 18, 2010 for “Catholic Under the Hood, Catholic history and theology from a Franciscan perspective.”  The article itself was titled “Today in Catholic History – The Last Episode of The Flying Nun.”

The article went on to talk about the old Sally Field’s sitcom from the late 1960’s to 1970 and its place in Catholic American history… yatta, yatta, yatta.

Overall, I did find the blog interesting but there was one major mistake in the article that apparently bothered me quite a bit [hence this blog].  The writer made reference to the fact that the sitcom was based upon a book written by Tere Rios.  This much was true; however the blog’s author gave the title of Ms. Rios’ book as, “The Fifteenth Pilgrim.”  The actual name of the book was “The Fifteenth Pelican!”   Had the blog not been two years old, I would have posted a comment with the correction but after two years, what difference does it make any longer?

Then there is the bigger question… Why do I even know this kind of useless information?

Over the years I have retained a seemingly endless well of the world’s most useless knowledge imaginable.  I know what the good witch from The Wizard of Oz says when the bad witch leaves Munchkin Land in a fiery burst of dark black smoke.  To most others, her first line is inaudible but somehow I not only discovered the line but sealed it away for future use.  FYI; as she waves her hand in front of her face Glenda says, “What a smell of sulfur!”  The rest of her speech you most likely know, “and to say you made rather a bad enemy of the Wicked Witch of the West, the sooner you get out of Oz all together, the safer you’ll sleep my dear.”  Then again, this may be a bad example as I know every single line to this movie and can recite it verbatim on command.  This alone is sickness enough. 

When my sister Janice was carpooling home from her job at a restaurant late one night with a group of friends, I was her lifeline when they wanted to find out what group sang the 1972/73 pop tune “Dancing in the Moonlight.  Even through my drowsiness at one o’clock in the morning I was able to respond, “King Harvest.”  Of course my Dancing in the Moonlight facts and information doesn’t stop there; I also know that King Harvest drummer Wells Kelly, whose brother Sherman actually wrote the song, went on to be the drummer for the group Orleans of “Dance With Me” and “Still the One” fame.

This morning James and I saw a promo for Johnny Depp’s new film Dark Shadow’s.  “I caught a few of the shows back in the day, but I don’t really remember what the storyline was about, do you?” James casually asked, refering to the TV Soap Opera of the late 1960’s that it spoof’s.  I not only remembered the storyline, but also the character names and… even found myself humming the tune to Quentin’s theme!  By the way, Kate Jackson played a ghost on that show before rising to fame on the Rookies and Charlie’s Angels.

It’s like a curse, I very often cannot recall what I had for breakfast on any given morning but I can hum the tune to all three of Lucille Ball’s hit comedy series, I Love Lucy, The Lucy Show and Here’s Lucy.  I don’t even want to hear from those of you who are going to bring up Life with Lucy, the very short-lived series she had on ABC, as I did say “HIT” series.  However even here, I can tell you that the show came out in 1986, stared Ball, and Lucy’s old friend and costar Gale Gordon.  I also remember that the show’s theme was sung by Eydie Gorme; a first for Lucy as her previous shows were jazzy instrumentals.  All three of these themes were composed by Wilbur Hatch (sorry, I can’t help myself, the junk just spills out if me).

I can sing the jingles to thousands upon thousands of commercials from the 1960’s and 1970’s and know the words to countless TV themes songs from My Mother the Car to Friends.  I not only remember the Yumbo, Burger King’s hot ham and cheese sandwich, but remember the jingle that introduced it.  I feel like I am the only one who remembers that Hawaiian Punch helped promote Donny and Marie Osmond’s movie “Goin’ Coconuts” in 1978.  I sometimes feel that I am the only one who even remembers Goin’ Coconuts! 

Now all of this nonsense aside, why can’t I remember where I put my reading glasses?

Until next time,


1 Comment

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One response to “I Know Way Too Much About Nothing…

  1. Theresa

    LOL i laughed all through this Don. Dont ask why you retain this information just accept it as another talent that you have.

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